Antony Worral Thompson Jokes

share save 256 24 Antony Worral Thompson Jokes

Whenever I’m choosing a fine wine from the supermarket, I always ask myself ‘How much would Antony Worral Thompson pay for this?’

I hope Anthony Worrall Thompson can’t see what I’ve written about him today.

I don’t want him stealing any of my jokes.

I saw Antony Worrall Thompson in the street today, so I decided to ask him for his autograph.

“Yeah, no problem” he smiled. “Have you got a pen?”

“Fuck off Antony, I’m not falling for that old chestnut mate.”

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Antony Worral Thompson Jokes

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Because it was stuffed inside Anthony Worrall Thompson’s Jacket.

Antony Worrall Thompson.

Sticky fingers, even when he’s not making cakes.

There’s no such thing as a free lunch.
Unless you’re using the Anthony Worrall Thompson recipe book.

Politically correct (PC) “Merry Christmas” to everyone!

share save 256 24 Politically correct (PC) Merry Christmas to everyone!
Good morning/afternoon/evening,

I wanted to send some sort of holiday greeting to friends and family, but it is difficult in today’s world to know exactly what to say without offending someone. So I met with my lawyer yesterday, and on advice I wish to say the following :

Please accept, with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress , non-addictive, gender neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday practiced with the most enjoyable traditions of religious persuasion or secular practices of your choice with respect for the religious / secular persuasions and / or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all .

I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2012, but not without due respect for the calendar of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make our country great ( not to imply that the United Kingdom is necessarily greater than any other country ) and without regard to the race, creed, colour, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishee .

By accepting this greeting, please be advised that you are accepting these terms :

This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable on the proviso that there is no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for her / him or others and is void where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. The wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher .

Best Regards ( without prejudice )

Name withheld ( Privacy Act )

CONGRATULATIONS TO ALL MY FRIENDS WHO WERE BORN IN THE 1940s, 50s, and 60s and 70s.

share save 256 24 CONGRATULATIONS TO ALL MY FRIENDS WHO WERE BORN IN THE 1940s, 50s, and 60s and 70s.

First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank Sherry while they carried us and lived in houses made of asbestos.
They took aspirin, ate blue cheese, bread and dripping, raw egg products, loads of bacon and processed meat, tuna from a tin, and didn’t get tested for diabetes or cervical cancer.
Then after that trauma, our baby cots were covered with bright coloured lead-based paints.

We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets or shoes, not to mention, the risks we took hitchhiking.
As children, we would ride in cars with no seat belts or air bags.
We drank water from the garden hose and NOT from a bottle.
Take away food was limited to fish and chips, no pizza shops, McDonalds , KFC, Subway or Nandos.
Even though all the shops closed at 6.00pm and didn’t open on a Sunday, somehow we didn’t starve to death!
We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and NO ONE actually died from this.
We could collect old drink bottles and cash them in at the corner store and buy Toffees, Gobstoppers and Bubble Gum.
We ate cupcakes, white bread and real butter, milk from the cow,and drank soft drinks with sugar in it, but we weren’t overweight because……
WE WERE ALWAYS OUTSIDE PLAYING!!
We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the streetlights came on.
No one was able to reach us all day. And we were O.K.
We would spend hours building our go-carts out of old prams and then ride down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. We built tree houses and dens and played in river beds with matchbox cars.
We did not have Playstations, Nintendo Wii , X-boxes, no video games at all, no 999 channels on SKY or dvd films, or flat screen colour TV’s,
no mobile phones, no personal computers, no Internet or Internet chat rooms………..WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside and found them!

We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were no
Lawsuits from these accidents.

Only girls had pierced ears!

We ate worms and mud pies made from dirt, and the worms did not live in us forever.

You could only buy Easter Eggs and Hot Cross Buns at Easter time….

We were given air guns and catapults for our 10th birthdays,

We rode bikes or walked to a friend’s house and knocked on the door or rang the bell, or just yelled for them!
Mum didn’t have to go to work to help dad make ends meet because we didn’t need to keep up with the Jones’s!

Not everyone made the rugby/football/cricket/netball team. Those who didn’t had to learn to deal with disappointment. Imagine that!! Getting into the team was based on
MERIT

Our teachers used to hit us with canes and gym shoes and throw the blackboard rubber at us if they thought we weren’t concentrating ..
We can string sentences together and spell and have proper conversations because of a good, solid three R’s education.
Our parents would tell us to ask a stranger to help us cross the road.
The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of.
They actually sided with the law!

Our parents didn’t invent stupid names for their kids like ‘Kiora’ and ‘Blade’ and ‘Ridge’ and ‘Vanilla’

We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned HOW TO
DEAL WITH IT ALL !

And YOU are one of them!
CONGRATULATIONS!
You might want to share this with others who have had the luck to grow up as kids, before the lawyers and the government regulated our lives for our own good.
And while you are at it, forward it to your kids so they will know how brave their parents were.

My Tram Experience by ladyk89 on youtube. Racist lady on tube train/tram.

share save 256 24 My Tram Experience by ladyk89 on youtube. Racist lady on tube train/tram.

My Tram Experience by ladyk89 on youtube. Racist lady on tube train/tram.

Do Curvy Women Make Better Lovers

share save 256 24 Do Curvy Women Make Better Lovers

Many men prefer curvy women over those who are very thin. This could be for several reasons. On an evolutionary base, larger women used to denote wealth and health. Even though that standard doesn’t apply today, the instinct for many may still be there. Other men just enjoy the way a curvaceous woman looks. Regardless of the reason, the question remains on whether they make better lovers. Here’s a closer look.
More Sensual
Many men have said that curvy women are more sensual. This could be because the curves give the illusion of more of a figure. The extra weight also creates a softer appearance. On top of that, curvy women tend to have larger hips, bust, and rear. All of these can create a more sensual experience in the bedroom.
A Few Myths
There are several myths surrounding BBW woman as well. Many people, men and women included, assume that curvy women are more desperate for sex and therefore are easy. This is not only untrue, it’s offensive. A larger woman has just as much choice as a thin woman, and they don’t have lower standards just because they carry extra weight. Another myth is that all larger women secretly want to be thin, causing depression and promiscuity. This is also grossly untrue. Many curvy women are perfectly happy with their shape and they aren’t depressed.
Better Lovers?
A lot of men will say that larger women are better lovers. The truth is the size itself doesn’t matter. It’s the individual woman and their experience levels that determine what kind of lovers they will be.

The Attraction of a BBW lady

share save 256 24 The Attraction of a BBW lady

Many men prefer a BBW over thin women. There are many reasons for this. In past centuries a larger woman denoted wealth and health, and for some men this biological instinct may have carried forward. For others they just want a woman who has curves. Here are just a few reasons men look at BBW dates favourably.

Body Differences

A BBW is going to have larger breasts, a larger butt, and more curves than a woman who is thin. Since breasts and butts are one of the most common factors that men find attractive, it stands to reason that the bigger ones would get more attention. While some men do want a woman with large breasts and a small waist, most are realistic enough to understand that with one comes the other.

Fetishes

Another reason some men may be interested in larger women is for fetish purposes. Some men enjoy feeding women and this becomes a sexual turn on. Some other fetishes may involve playing with the excess fat and curves on a BBWs body. The downside to this is many women who are larger don’t want to be seen as a fetish only, and men who are interested in these fetishes may have a hard time finding a willing partner.

Finding BBWs

Most adult dating sites allow you to create specific search criteria. This will allow you to find only women who list themselves as being larger or BBWs. Many of these sites also have specific categories just for BBW women and their admirers.

http://www.freesexymatch.com/

Fatima Whitbread jokes

share save 256 24 Fatima Whitbread jokes

Who will win this year’s I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here?

That Mark Wright is quite popular, but I reckon Fatima Whitbread’s the man.

Last week my wife caught me in bed with Fatima Whitbread.
“It’s not what it looks like,” I pleaded.
“Well, what is it then?” she asked with a puzzled look on her face.
“A woman,” I replied.

Ant: Well people the good news is that this Bush Tucker Trial involves one of you eating a penis.

Dec: The bad news is it belongs to Fatima Whitbread.

The only feminine thing about Fatima Whitbread is her pink bellend.

You’ve got to admire Fatima Whitbread for her bravery in going into the jungle.

She’s certainly got balls!

Whats the heaviest thing in the jungle?

Fattima whitbreads testicles

After watching Mark pass his challenge on ‘I’m a Celebrity’ tonight, I think it’s pretty clear who the alpha male of the group is.

Fatima Whitbread.

Fatima Whitbread.

Proving I would wank to Susan Boyle

What’s the worst bush-tucker trial imaginable?

Eating out Fatima Whitbread.

Fatima Whitbread has decided to change her name to something a little more English.

Steve!

Please feel free to submit your own Fatima  Whitbread jokes in the comments below. Thanks icon wink Fatima Whitbread jokes

C&T Cleaning website SEO for new Office and Domestic Cleaning Services Company in Nottingham

share save 256 24 C&T Cleaning website SEO for new Office and Domestic Cleaning Services Company in Nottingham

C&T is a new domestic and office cleaning services website in Nottingham, UK – you can find out more about here about their office cleaning services in Nottingham, UK

New campaign to end the moaning about RBL Poppy Day

share save 256 24 New campaign to end the moaning about RBL Poppy Day

Facing year upon year of shops banning the sale of poppies, employers banning the wearing of them, muslim protests and poppy burning, The OOA has launched the RBL Poppy Day and we are going to have it! campaign on its website, and on a facebook connect group.

Free Sexy Match Online Dating – Singles Love Matchmaker

share save 256 24 Free Sexy Match Online Dating   Singles Love Matchmaker

Our Free Online Dating, Free Sexy Match is a non Big Brother BBW online dating website for singles to chat, meetup or webcam looking for relationsips, love or friends. Find your ideal relationsip with a handsome boyfriend or sexy girlfriend in the UK, US, CA, AU, NZ or SA.

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