Freeride marathon – Bardonecchia – 2010
Saturday, June 26th, 2010
Archive for June, 2010
I dedicate this to all the “Braindead” individuals I know….
Friday, June 18th, 2010….that will argue against me, fight for their incorrect opinion of me, and the people who disrespect me.
To me, you are nothing but a waste of oxygen and a tosser. Load it watch it on YouTube (full screen), because it will convince you to understand:
Only the average British Soldier to most waste of space civilians!
Terrorist Threat Alert Levels by country
Tuesday, June 15th, 2010The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats and have raised their security level from “Miffed” to “Peeved.” Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to “Irritated” or even “A Bit Cross.” The English have not been “A Bit Cross” since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies all but ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized from “Tiresome” to a “Bloody Nuisance.” The last time the British issued a “Bloody Nuisance” warning level was during the great fire of 1666.
The Scots raised their threat level from “Pissed Off” to “Let’s get the Bastards” They don’t have any other levels. This is the reason they have been used on the frontline in the British army for the last 300 years.
The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from “Run” to “Hide”. The only two higher levels in France are “Collaborate” and “Surrender.” The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France ‘s white flag factory, effectively paralysing the country’s military capability. It’s not only the French who are on a heightened level of alert.
Italy has increased the alert level from “Shout loudly and excitedly” to “Elaborate Military Posturing.” Two more levels remain”: Ineffective Combat Operations” and “Change Sides.”
The Germans also increased their alert state from “Disdainful Arrogance” to “Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs.” They also have two higher levels: “Invade a Neighbour” and”Lose”.
Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual, and the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels .
The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.
Canada doesn’t have any alert levels.
Americans meanwhile are carrying out pre-emptive strikes on small countries and all their allies, just in case.
New Zealand has also raised its security levels – from “baaa” to “BAAAA!”. Due to continuing defense cutbacks (the air force being a squadron of spotty teenagers flying paper aeroplanes and the navy some toy boats in the Prime Minister’s bath), New Zealand only has one more level of escalation, which is “Shit, I hope Australia will come end rescue us”. In the event of invasion, New Zealanders will be asked to gather together in a strategic defensive position called “Bondi”.
Australia , meanwhile, has raised its security level from “No worries” to “She’ll be all right, mate”. Three more escalation levels remain, “Crikey!’, “I think we’ll need to cancel the barbie this weekend” and “The barbie is cancelled”. So far no situation has ever warranted use of the final two escalation levels .
The zebra!
Tuesday, June 15th, 2010A Zebra dies and arrives at the Pearly Gates.. As he enters, he asks St. Peter, ‘I have a question that’s haunted me all of my days on earth. Am I white with black stripes, or am I black with white stripes?’
St. Peter said, ‘That’s a question only God can answer.’
So the zebra went off in search of God.
When he found Him, the zebra asked, ‘God, please – I must know Am I white with black stripes, or am I black with white stripes?’
God simply replied ‘You are what you are.’
The zebra returned to see St. Peter once more, who asked him, ‘Well, did God straighten out your query for you?’
The zebra looked puzzled.. ‘No sir, God simply said ‘You are what you are.’
St. Peter smiled and said to the zebra, ‘Well then, there you are. You are white with black stripes..’
The zebra asked St. Peter, ‘How do you know that for certain?’
Because,’ said St. Peter, ‘If you were black with white stripes, God would have said, ‘You is what you is..’
WARNING: If you laugh at this, Al Sharpton, Jesse Jackson, Rev Wright and Obama will be comin after yo white ass!
Can you imagine working for a company?
Wednesday, June 9th, 2010That has a little more than 600 employees and has the following statistics:
1. 29 have been accused of spouse abuse.
2. 7 have been arrested for fraud.
3. 19 have been accused of writing bad cheques.
4. 117 have directly or indirectly bankrupted at least 2 businesses.
5. 3 have done time for assault.
6. 71 cannot get a credit card due to bad credit.
7. 4 have been arrested on drug-related charges.
8. 8 have been arrested for shoplifting.
9. 21 are currently defendants in lawsuits.
10. 84 have been arrested for drink driving in the last year.
Which organization is this?
It’s the 635 members of the House of Commons, the same group that cranks out hundreds of new laws each year designed to keep the rest of us in line.
Gillette Mach 4′s v’s Wilkinson-Sword Xtreme 3′s
Monday, June 7th, 2010Gillette Mach 4′s v’s Wilkinson-Sword Xtreme 3′s? No competition. Gillette Mach 4′s are cool and Wilkinson-Sword Xtreme 3′s are completely useless. Especially if you are not clearing the odd babies nipple hairs from your Beautiful Italian Girls breasts.
The Gillette Mach 4′s can clear 4 weeks Alpine beard growth and perhaps make 2/3 times. The Wilkinson-Sword Xtreme 3′s simply cannot, you’ll need an old toothbrush to clear the razor of debris every scrap, it’s blades and blade housing haven’t been tested, and its cheap plastic construction are next to Korean slave labour manufacture. It is quite simply shite and the guy who called them extreme knows they are “extremely shit”. Don’t be fooled by the package and price, as my girl was!
John o’Groats to Lands End – The Longest Try – Veterans International Aid (VIA) for PTSD
Saturday, June 5th, 2010Every now and again, people that I call fantastic give up a load of their time, to do something amazing for other people. Billy MacLeod and his friends gave up their time to walk from John o’Groats to Lands End carrying a rugby ball – The Longest Try – To raise money for the charity Billy created – Veterans International Aid (VIA) for firstly getting the British governament to acknoledge Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) actually exists in British Soldiers, to raise awareness in others and to get it treated.
11% of the UK prison population is ex British Soldiers with PTSD, 40% of ex British Soldiers have it (60% in Special Forces). It is NOT SOMETHING TO IGNORE. IT COSTS RELATIONSHIPS, MARRIAGES AND EVEN KILLS! Find out more about PTSD at http://www.v-i-a.org.uk/ or http://www.robert-stirling.com/
